Works of art are of an infinite loneliness and nothing can reach them so little as criticism. Only love can grasp them and keep hold of them and be just to them.  Always trust yourself and your own feelings. Rainer Maria Rilke

There’s so much on my mind as summer brews hot and cold, foggy and steamy, and I re-enter life as I used to know it.  Family, friends, work, love – how to find a new balance.

My own studio work, for one thing, though it seems I’m a bit distracted though in bits and drabs.  I’m working on a series of artist books about Biblical women, which is endlessly fascinating.   My through line research question is “What did Sarah do all day? I know it sounds funny, but honestly, she was 90 years old when she birthed Isaac, so you have to wonder what happened over those 90 years. It’s led me to deep reading and research about women’s lives in ancient Hebrew culture.

As to research. I am truly devoted to this aspect of my work. Reading widely, trying things out, gathering materials, thinking through the question, refining the question, more experimenting, finding my own path through the materials and ideas. So while researching the time of Sarah, I’m busy spinning goat hair, the material of choice for the nomadic life and making of tents in 1900 BCE, and practicing cuneiform letters, and collecting nose rings as one aspect of material culture. Because I am also a writer, working alone and constant revision are two practices that I’m very comfortable with. I’m not sure where this research will lead, but I am sure it’s necessary.

 

And then poetry. I’ve asked myself many times if the art making process is the same for writing poetry. For me, I often start with random free writing, generating language about ideas and phenomena that I didn’t know I was thinking about. Free writing is like free association – no particular outcome, just language and thought. Once an idea begins to emerge I keep working it, but I find I have to force myself not to close down too quickly on an idea or insight. A poem emerges somehow. That crystallization into form definitely feels very much the same as making art.

From “There are so many things to do today”

Outside, the tide is coming in.

A skin of ripples approach the shore.

Might the sea be most content

when it is high –

suffering a little as it moves

away from land?

                                                                                    Weisman, 2021

Yet, I see now those two practices are really quite different.  The first, about research and art is finding the true subject without a particular form.  The second, about poetry writing, is form without a particular subject.  Now, that’s the first time I ever said that. I thought both practices were about crystallizing raw materials – materials and words – into art.

I am wondering what this has to do with Covid 19, which has also been on my mind endlessly.  Am I looking for new forms, new subject matter?  What is it I am hoping to either explore or ignore? I can only say that I am pushing myself to sit with these questions.  And the poet Rilke is about as good as it gets for some inspiration.

And so, on to re-entry. I look to my children and grandchildren to see how their re-entry is working out.  I talk with friends about what they’re hoping for. I have a new desire to make life simpler. To restrict a lot of unnecessary moving from here to there. I’ve learned to like my meetings on Zoom, and to want my family and friendships in person. I’m thinking about what makes each day worthwhile and how to eliminate that which doesn’t matter. Who I choose to spend time with means deep engaging time.  I see I have my subject, but it’s not completely well-formed yet.  And art and artmaking and poetry is the form around which the subject of my new post-Covid life will revolve.